Where do we go from here?
Dec. 29th, 2009 05:08 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
sagesaria2009 has been simultaniously one of the best and most emotionally chaotic years of my life. So much has happened all at once, I've learned so much about myself, I almost feel like so much is just changing out of the blue.
I've been in a musical, I got a job at last, I thought about a possible career, I went back to school with a specific goal in mind, I've had ups and downs with Anthoney (most recently up), I've had laughs and tears with and about my closest friends, I got a facebook and got back in touch with some of said friends, if there's anything else I can't even think of it because it's all a blur. But those are the big highlights this year. Tommy especially; I can easily say that Tommy, despite its drama and stress and strain, was the best three months of my life. Just being involved in something so energetic and fun means so much to me, and as a bonus I left an impression; you know how many people said I made an amazing nurse? I feel like I've grown up a little too, not just because I'm 21, but just....lately I've had moments of just sucking it up and doing things I hate (which reminds me I still have some shit to do today lol), and while I haven't changed much about my negative traits, I've at least started figuring out how to put words to these traits, so if I can't change what's wrong I can at least say what's wrong, and possibly figure out what works and what doesn't regarding changing them. But if there's anything that's changed, it's been my attitude about class. I NAILED that class, and I think I have Panera to thank for that. A place close by out of the house with good food and wifi; a perfect place to study, and that's exactly what it's been for me. I've never been more motivated to work on school, even with the distractions of wifi. I've been able to get done in a few hours what can take me a few days if I need to work myself up to do homework at home.
Overall I think I accomplished my goal of at least STARTING to change for the better this year. So that leaves me with one question: Now what?
Theatre-wise, I have no idea. I would love to possibly continue in the theatre business, especially if it means possibly working with Roberta again (probably not a lot of the people from Tommy, though :( ), but I had all the time for world for Tommy; I'd skipped that semester and I didn't have a job, so there was nothing else to do except that play. Now I have a job and I'm trying to take classes again. Tommy was intense enough when it was the only thing I was doing. I have no idea if I can handle another play AND work and school. As I am right now, I doubt it, which makes me sad.
Work-wise, I think I'm going to try to get out of Sears. I know I keep getting warned that if I'm unhappy at Sears I'll be unhappy everywhere. I know I won't be able to fix everything if I try a new job. But dammit I want to try because I can't stand Sears. What I really want to do come the new year is look into three specific places; 1. Hour Eyes. I know that's pretty much retail with a new face, but in a way it IS optometry. I may end up learning about the terminology or the equipment or even just how to read a prescription. Any of those will be a good indicator of whether or not this might be something I'll want to do with the rest of my life. And that's something I want to learn soon, because being in a new place decision-wise is so hopeful and I don't want to fall back to square one. 2. Trader Joe's. Yeah, more retail, but it was suggested to me by someone in my Bio class and it sounds at least financially better than Sears. She said she loves it, which could be a good sign, and she said it pays pretty well. More money would be a great thing to have. 3. Temp agencies. They won't replace Sears, but they'll be an alternative sourse of income and very well COULD turn into a permanent job and replace Sears. I miss office jobs, getting back into that could be very happy.
Class-wise, I think I want to keep doing math and sciences, but I still don't know if optometry is the thing. In biology, the main things that kept my interest haven't really been, at least that I can see, related to optometry. I can't exactly make a career out of making punnet squares XD Also Sean stated himself that he was an easy teacher. I love easy teachers, but I always feel a tiny bit edgy when I know they're an easy teacher, because it makes me wonder if I'm actually absorbing enough of the material and how that will affect me and my grade later if I encounter a totally different teacher. But I guess all I can really do is wait and see as I keep doing this class thing.
Misc.-wise, I kind of want to do something with my hair this year. Chastity has offered to straighten it for me, which is something I've always wanted to do. Everybody keeps asking if I'm sure I want to, and yes I am sure. Some warn that I might hate it, but we won't know until we try, and I know I'm not too fond of my curls. Quite a few people have offered to straighten my hair, I should probably take it up with one of them, lol >>; Also, I want to try to get new glasses real soon; the frames are falling apart, and this prescription is almost six years old and it's starting to show as I squint at the whiteboard in class. And if any of you remember how I wanted to learn to play the violin, maybe, just maybe I'll actually try for that this coming year. At the very least I think I want to pick up the guitar more seriously again.
So yeah, let's see whatchoo got, 2010?
I've been in a musical, I got a job at last, I thought about a possible career, I went back to school with a specific goal in mind, I've had ups and downs with Anthoney (most recently up), I've had laughs and tears with and about my closest friends, I got a facebook and got back in touch with some of said friends, if there's anything else I can't even think of it because it's all a blur. But those are the big highlights this year. Tommy especially; I can easily say that Tommy, despite its drama and stress and strain, was the best three months of my life. Just being involved in something so energetic and fun means so much to me, and as a bonus I left an impression; you know how many people said I made an amazing nurse? I feel like I've grown up a little too, not just because I'm 21, but just....lately I've had moments of just sucking it up and doing things I hate (which reminds me I still have some shit to do today lol), and while I haven't changed much about my negative traits, I've at least started figuring out how to put words to these traits, so if I can't change what's wrong I can at least say what's wrong, and possibly figure out what works and what doesn't regarding changing them. But if there's anything that's changed, it's been my attitude about class. I NAILED that class, and I think I have Panera to thank for that. A place close by out of the house with good food and wifi; a perfect place to study, and that's exactly what it's been for me. I've never been more motivated to work on school, even with the distractions of wifi. I've been able to get done in a few hours what can take me a few days if I need to work myself up to do homework at home.
Overall I think I accomplished my goal of at least STARTING to change for the better this year. So that leaves me with one question: Now what?
Theatre-wise, I have no idea. I would love to possibly continue in the theatre business, especially if it means possibly working with Roberta again (probably not a lot of the people from Tommy, though :( ), but I had all the time for world for Tommy; I'd skipped that semester and I didn't have a job, so there was nothing else to do except that play. Now I have a job and I'm trying to take classes again. Tommy was intense enough when it was the only thing I was doing. I have no idea if I can handle another play AND work and school. As I am right now, I doubt it, which makes me sad.
Work-wise, I think I'm going to try to get out of Sears. I know I keep getting warned that if I'm unhappy at Sears I'll be unhappy everywhere. I know I won't be able to fix everything if I try a new job. But dammit I want to try because I can't stand Sears. What I really want to do come the new year is look into three specific places; 1. Hour Eyes. I know that's pretty much retail with a new face, but in a way it IS optometry. I may end up learning about the terminology or the equipment or even just how to read a prescription. Any of those will be a good indicator of whether or not this might be something I'll want to do with the rest of my life. And that's something I want to learn soon, because being in a new place decision-wise is so hopeful and I don't want to fall back to square one. 2. Trader Joe's. Yeah, more retail, but it was suggested to me by someone in my Bio class and it sounds at least financially better than Sears. She said she loves it, which could be a good sign, and she said it pays pretty well. More money would be a great thing to have. 3. Temp agencies. They won't replace Sears, but they'll be an alternative sourse of income and very well COULD turn into a permanent job and replace Sears. I miss office jobs, getting back into that could be very happy.
Class-wise, I think I want to keep doing math and sciences, but I still don't know if optometry is the thing. In biology, the main things that kept my interest haven't really been, at least that I can see, related to optometry. I can't exactly make a career out of making punnet squares XD Also Sean stated himself that he was an easy teacher. I love easy teachers, but I always feel a tiny bit edgy when I know they're an easy teacher, because it makes me wonder if I'm actually absorbing enough of the material and how that will affect me and my grade later if I encounter a totally different teacher. But I guess all I can really do is wait and see as I keep doing this class thing.
Misc.-wise, I kind of want to do something with my hair this year. Chastity has offered to straighten it for me, which is something I've always wanted to do. Everybody keeps asking if I'm sure I want to, and yes I am sure. Some warn that I might hate it, but we won't know until we try, and I know I'm not too fond of my curls. Quite a few people have offered to straighten my hair, I should probably take it up with one of them, lol >>; Also, I want to try to get new glasses real soon; the frames are falling apart, and this prescription is almost six years old and it's starting to show as I squint at the whiteboard in class. And if any of you remember how I wanted to learn to play the violin, maybe, just maybe I'll actually try for that this coming year. At the very least I think I want to pick up the guitar more seriously again.
So yeah, let's see whatchoo got, 2010?
