(no subject)
Feb. 13th, 2006 11:31 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
sagesariaI fucking hate David's parents.
Last night, they said that David could probably come over, but today, they started hemming and hawing about how much stuff he had to do when they KNEW LAST NIGHT that he had to do them. So their "probably" because a "doubt."
This has happened ALL. FUCKING. YEAR.
Why the fuck do they pile all this shit onto him? He has a life of his own, and it should have to be cut off by a million things that he doesn't want to do. No human being should have this much stress and work.
This is getting really fucking discouraging. Since this started happening, I have been falling into loneliness and depression. It feels like every time I try to get someone over here, they can't make it, or think they can, then realise at the last minute that they can't. Damien has been going everywhere but here, David can't leave the house unless it's for business...I haven't even seen Jordi at gaming in forever!
I just need someone here to talk to. I need it so badly! But every fucking time I try, it fails.
I would really like Eris to leave me the fuck alone for once!
Last night, they said that David could probably come over, but today, they started hemming and hawing about how much stuff he had to do when they KNEW LAST NIGHT that he had to do them. So their "probably" because a "doubt."
This has happened ALL. FUCKING. YEAR.
Why the fuck do they pile all this shit onto him? He has a life of his own, and it should have to be cut off by a million things that he doesn't want to do. No human being should have this much stress and work.
This is getting really fucking discouraging. Since this started happening, I have been falling into loneliness and depression. It feels like every time I try to get someone over here, they can't make it, or think they can, then realise at the last minute that they can't. Damien has been going everywhere but here, David can't leave the house unless it's for business...I haven't even seen Jordi at gaming in forever!
I just need someone here to talk to. I need it so badly! But every fucking time I try, it fails.
I would really like Eris to leave me the fuck alone for once!
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no subject
Date: 2006-02-13 05:02 pm (UTC)This one's all about people.
It's not Her job to simply Mess Up Peoples' Plans.
Chaos is a lot more complex than that. If you can predict something happening, if there's a pattern, then it's not Chaotic.
What you need to do right now is to figure out the "other" way of getting what you want, and ask Eris to help you find that. Among other things, She's a Goddess of "Stuff You Don't Plan For", or "Stuff You'd Never Thought Of" which is exactly the kind of inspiration you need. She has her "plan randomising" moments, but not all spoilt plans are Her fault, even tho she gets the blame for most of that especially among people who say they embrace Randomness, and yet are frightened to give up Control.
The Myth of the Golden Apple is there to teach us that we CAN'T control everything, and that to attempt to do so is caused by the kind of hubris that wrecks parties and causes war. If anything, it sounds like your friends are caught in a cycle of *too much* control.
Which, by the way, is a hallmark of the teenage years. The most effective solution? Patience, and a patient working towards independence. There will come a time when your friends parents will not be there to control every step of their lives. Be patient and it will arrive. It could even arrive before you're prepared for it, so you might want to reconsider wishing for that time to be NOW.
In the meantime, continue to BE a good friend, and sooner or later, when somebody needs one, you'll be right there.
Hugs
no subject
Date: 2006-02-13 10:33 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-02-13 11:16 pm (UTC)You really shoulddn't mention him. I melt into puddles of goo when you do. It's cruel to metion hom when I have no hope of seeing him.
Oh gee, I'm so sorry that I mentioned someone who is a part of my life...>_>
no subject
Date: 2006-02-14 11:30 pm (UTC)I'm really sorry, but I can't make it. the family (and I) are going to Boston for a con, but if you're not busy weekend after next, I can see about visiting friday night or saturday if you're not busy?
no subject
Date: 2006-02-13 11:08 pm (UTC)This is a problem in flake management.
Want to try something really ballsy?
Verify with David the facts of the matter. If they jive with that scenario ask David for his parent's email address and send them a VERY NICE note politely saying the following. Do NOT send it if David was the person who didn't communicate what they said to you, or else you'll look like an idiot.
Dear David's Parents-
I realize David is your child and he has responsibilities, but I would appreciate it if you did not tell David that he can probably come over to my house at a certain time if he has things he needs to get done. In that case, the answer should be, "If he gets his tasks done".
As it happened, because of the failure to communicate me this information, I begged off on other plans I could have made. I understand that surprises happen, but this seems to me as if nobody was caught unawares.
Sincerely,
Saria
Yes, an ever so polite, Miss Manners type letter reminding them that even teenagers sometimes warrant the basic consideration they'd give the garden variety adult.
Again, this only works if youre POSITIVE it was their fault. If someone's making an excuse and blaming it on their parents, it's the wrong play.